Sent Thursday, June 4, 2009 – on my birthday. It sounds like I might be a lot like Dad when it comes to celebrating.
Dear Justin, GLAD BIRTHDAY TIDINGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Back in ‘77, after celebrating your birth with Uncle Charlie O, Uncle Charlie R, and Uncle Barry, I remarked that “I am not responsible for anything that I say or do”.
Charlie O. said, “that’s obvious to the most casual observer”.
Not sure why I remember that, or how I remember it, for that matter.
Much Love and Always, Dad.
Sent Monday, June 9, 2008 to my cousins graduating from High School.
Congratulations!!!! Very soon, you will learn that the refrigerator has nothing in it unless you put it there.
This is a snippet of an email I received from Dad in response to something I had sent him. It made me laugh so I decided to post it.
Dear Just, I am so confused. Well, no more than normal, what with your Mom and all. I’ll never forget the first time that I saw your Mother. It was back in March of 1970 at her Dad’s farm. I walked into the kitchen and saw her for the first time, and I thought, WOW. And then she started talking, and as she spoke a vague fog of confusion crept over me. I have never been able to shake that feeling to this very day.
This was sent a couple days after Columbus Day. Once again, it’s just a snippet of the entire email.
Christopher Columbus? Big deal. When he left, he didn’t know where he was going, and when he got there he didn’t know where he was, and when he got back he didn’t know where he had been. Annie says that it sounds like men in general.
Sent: Saturday, January 13, 2007 – Original email edited by me to only include story content
This is me. I once shot myself in the chest with a 22 rifle. My target was a brick. Hit the thing dead center. Then it hit me dead center. It felt as though someone had poked me in the center of the chest with a stick as hard as they could. The impact left a bruise the size of a half dollar, and was sore for a week or so. The flattened bullet I found lying on the ground at my feet. Never said a word to Mom or Dad. Never shot a brick again either.
Sent: Thursday, November 9, 2006 – Original email edited by me to only include story content
This is me. I stopped at the store after work today for a Birthday card for our Joeie, but after 10 minutes of waiting behind someone returning this and questioning that, I set the card down and walked out. I never have been much good at waiting in line. Neither do I suffer a fool very well, and when the two are rolled into one, my patience really takes a beating.
Sent: Thursday, June 15, 2006 – Original email edited by me to only include story content
This is me. I had to take the driving part of the test twice. On my first try, I failed to run a green light. That’s right. The cop said that I was the first guy to stop on green that he had ever heard of. By the way, does a yellow light still mean go like the dickens before it turns red?
Yes, but watch out for those red light cameras!
Sent: Saturday, January 28, 2006 – Original email edited by me to only include story content
This is me. I don’t have a terrible towel. I do have a terrible mug however, but it doesn’t really work out all that well. You get excited and start waving it around, and coffee goes flying all over the place. Maybe some day. As Annie always tells me, “You have a birthday coming up.” And then she doesn’t get me what I wanted anyway. Even so, she’s nice to have around.
Sent: Sunday, February 10, 2002
This is me. After being married for 30 years, I have learned that there are times when it is best to pretend that you have nothing to say on a given subject. This is one of those times.
Sent: Wednesday, October 10, 2001
This is me. Well, it’s that time of the year again. No, not football or fall foliage. I am referring to the pink ribbons that cover the pillars and railings of the Susquehanna County Courthouse, the parking meters, trees and so forth. When I first saw these ribbons several years ago, I was confused. Although I must admit that after living with Annie for almost 30 years, confusion is my normal state. But I digress. When I returned to the office, I asked the office personnel what all the pink ribbons were all about. (Note to the women libber types; I did not say office girls.) Maureen, while searching through some paperwork said that “it’s breast awareness week”. I marveled at this saying. Wanting to show them that for once I was ahead of the curve, so to speak, I rather proudly said, “I have been aware of breasts since I was in my early teens”. Carol, looking rather red in the face, blurted out, “it’s breast CANCER awareness week”. I do not intend to make light of such a horrible disease, but when I see those pink ribbons, I just can’t suppress a smile.
 | mary a. kaufman on My Birthday |
| mary a. kaufman on Cutting Wood |
| mary a. kaufman on Cow magnets |
| mary a. kaufman on Cow magnets |
 | Kid sister Bette on Cow magnets |
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